5 Hard Lessons I Learned in 2024

As we come to the end of the year, and you’re getting flooded with emails about sales and gift guides (obviously you’ve already seen our only huge sale of the year 😜), I wanted to put a spin on my usual thank you note to this community.

I always like to take this time out to straight up say I AM SO GRATEFUL FOR YOU. The fact that you’ve kept a small, independent herbal business going throughout the years is nothing short of a miracle. You’ve allowed us to not only stay true to our roots without investor interests, but continue to launch functional formulas that are changing the lives of so many. 

Our PCOS kit, which launched earlier this year, was a huge milestone for us. Thanks to you, this daily duo is helping thousands of women support their hormones, fertility, and quality of life. There are so few answers out there for PCOS that this felt incredibly important. It’s because of you that we’re able to continue creating options for those who are taking their health into their own hands.

I could go on all day about how lucky we are to have a community like you all, but I figured this year I would instead finish off this email by sharing some personal, and hopefully helpful musings: a list of 5 life-altering things (health related and beyond) that I learned in 2024.

1. It wouldn’t be true to my soul if I didn’t put this first: we’re finally beginning to understand that histamine intolerance, and histamine-driven chronic conditions like MCAS (mast cell activation syndrome) are at the root of so many unexplained mystery symptoms that many of us have been dealing with our whole lives. If you’ve dealt with cyclical, “I thought I just had to live this way” symptoms your whole life – like unexplained insomnia, bouts of anxiety where your heart is racing out of your chest, frequent urination in the middle of the night, random hives and skin rashes, IBS, food and environmental allergies to the point where it seems like you’re sensitive to the whole world, this is an important topic to understand. You can listen to the deep dive episode HERE on the podcast, and next season we’ll be going into the role of the nervous system and stress when it comes to pushing the immune system (and thus, our histamine response) into overdrive. 

2. Speaking of the nervous system, it feels like that’s where the next frontier in root-cause medicine is headed. The other day I went to see a doctor for my MCAS but was quickly reminded that so much of this complex condition really comes down to my brain perceiving stress and telling my body to bring out the big guns. This year, I’ve learned that cultivating capacity and flexibility within my nervous system has been able to move the needle with my health when even the perfect diet or routine can’t. With a regulated nervous system, we are able to hold and face the reality of life’s stressors without wanting to melt away. We can learn how to FEEL into our emotions without completely drowning in them. And we have the space to develop a real, genuine friendship with ourselves and others. I believe that the future of the holistic health world truly is nervous system regulation – and I don’t mean doing a 20 minute meditation thinking that’s going to fix it all. Often, what’s needed to expand the capacity of our nervous systems is actually doing the things we either completely avoid or completely deprive ourselves of. For instance, having the difficult, yet extremely human and bond-building conversation with a loved one about the icky things we usually sweep under the rug. Or having the courage to try something new and go after the creative projects that don’t feed into our “productivity = worth” society but do feed our souls. Or having the courage to say NO to the things that are causing us to drown in stress, even if that means disappointing others or ourselves expectation-wise. This requires us to get realistic about our needs and the sacrifices it’s going to take to meet them: what we simply can and can NOT do in a modern world where we’re expected to do it all. Sometimes, that means being honest about what we are willing to prioritize and what we simply must take off our plates. Other times, that means adding to our plates the things that challenge us and bring out our fight, flight, courage response – then choosing that courage over and over again, in the tiniest ways, every single day until it becomes who we are.

3. Building on that further, I find that it’s so much easier to display that courage response and take one tiny step forward each day when we know what we’re working towards and why. I believe and have learned that once we identify and loudly accept our unique gifts, it is so much easier to reorganize and shift everything else in our lives so that we can move in the giftedness and calling within each of us. Accepting and owning that you’re gifted is not shameful or self-aggrandizing. Rather, it’s how we give ourselves permission to truly prioritize and question what matters in our lives, so that we can move forward from a place of focus on service. Each and every one of you reading this is gifted. Once you realize and accept that you’re meant to do something here, you realize just how much of what we fill our precious time with is a distraction. Seeking the approval of others, comparison, self-doubt, unnecessary drama, self-destructive vices (which are far more attractive when we are denying our true selves!) can fall away far more easily when you see that you could be honing your gifts and taking one step toward them every day. If you’re confused about where to start, ask yourself: what MUST you do, because if you do not do it, it will not get done. For me, that always comes back to telling stories; through the podcast, through music, through making meaning of my own health journey and the patterns I’ve recognized, breaking down complex health issues into dots that connect using my life as a story board. If I don’t tell my stories the way I tell them, they may not be received. In other words, what will the world miss if you don’t stand tall?

4. Speaking of the huge life changes and “no’s” required to live in a way that feels good to our nervous systems… I have a feeling that many of you, like me, are embarking on huge identity shifts and new chapters. Trying something new. Being willing to go down the scary road of being a beginner again. Leaving behind jobs or relationships that have run their course. Saying no to the life you built around what you once thought would make you happy. Especially when you’ve spent your 20’s and maybe even your 30’s, 40’s and 50’s working towards ONE accomplishment or area of expertise, it can be extremely unsettling to try to believe that there’s more life for us to live. Perhaps a different way to live or a new body of work that wants to come through us. Aren’t we already beyond lucky to have experienced even a taste of stability or success in one area? Shouldn’t we just hold tight to that, even though it feels like that’s no longer where we’d be of greatest service or happiness? I have learned that this isn’t the last thing you’ll create. You will, and deserve to, continue meeting, reinventing, and discovering yourself. Remember that there is a period of death that comes before a rebirth. And also remember that in that period of death and nothingness, there is still so much happening – unlearning, integration, preparation, deconditioning. We are never sitting still, even when it feels as such. Give yourself time and space as you become this next iteration of you; you are certainly not alone, as all of us are with you going through the same process of accepting our full and multifaceted nature (and all the grief that comes with leaving behind who we thought we were). Lean on your herbal allies to support your nervous system as you move through the discomfort of shedding your skin and giving yourself the freedom to play, make mistakes, try, and reveal.

5. And that leads me to my last point: I have learned that you’re doing yourself a huge disservice if you’re afraid to try something new. The way our world is structured, we are taught to value the end product. The mastery. The perceived perfection, the thing we can consume and use to our advantage because it’s packaged neatly for our pleasure. In reality, the greatest value lies in the process – the possibility that play allows or the direction and wisdom that ‘the suck’ gifts us. While working with a leadership coach this year, I found out that when I’m doing something new (which requires me to ultimately play in order to learn and grow) I immediately want to give up, because from a young age, I’ve associated the feeling of “the suck” with *me* sucking or being shameful or wrong. Often that’s why we are so unwilling to be uncomfortable or go after the things that we truly want. We’ve made that inevitable process of stumbling at first (aka: learning) mean that there’s something inherently wrong with us. Through my work with my coach, I learned that saying hello and getting curious about what sucks, allows me to fully see the thing I’m learning to the point where I can honor it and do better. Not being able to master something at first, and instead having to play, is actually the secret sauce.