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Yesterday I was clever, so I wanted to change the world.
Today I am wise, so I am changing myself.

Rumi

This is a statement that never fully hit me until I learned the hard way that you cannot change the people you love most… no matter how pure your intentions, or how qualified your advice.

When I first began changing my habits and diet for the sake of my health, I realized how incredible us humans were designed to feel. I saw the light and wanted to help everyone else feel better, too – especially those closest to me like my mother, father, boyfriend, etc. I spent so much time and energy showing them what they could do & what they should do, often taking it personally when the lessons didn’t stick and my efforts went to waste.

The truth is: when you look at it from the perspective of “changing the world” or “changing” other people, you have almost zero power or control. People (including me and you) only change when a fire is lit deep within them; when they want it so badly they’re willing to take the consistent steps only they can choose to wake up every day and take. You can’t be there to cook their breakfast every morning, to shove supplements down their throat or to drag them to the gym. And sometimes, telling them what to do only makes it worse because it all feels so big and overwhelming.

But when they see you breaking down that big, overwhelming picture into tangible steps every single day? That’s when everything clicks. Showing others instead of telling them is the most effective method of creating change in this world because you’re living proof that it’s both possible and attainable.

When you change yourself first, that is where your power lies. When you respect yourself enough to keep showing up for your goals even when it’s not easy, you give others the permission and motivation to show up too.

When you commit to your own growth, you give others hope – which in my book is a far better gift than advice that falls on deaf ears. Your example has the power to make waves you never thought possible.

xo,
Olivia

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2 Comments

  • Alyssa says:

    Hi Olivia,
    I’ve struggled with this issue and sincerely speaking; I think I use encouraging others, i.e my fiancee’, as an excuse to procrastinate on working on myself, physically, herbally, etc. There is nothing stopping me from educating myself about herbal remedies, purchasing the items, preparing meals, exercising more, drinking more water, etc. For some reason it almost feels socially engrained to ‘control’ or get irritated when your partner is not jumping aboard at the same speed as you are. Your advice to just charge ahead is solid; I am glued to your blog as it is super helpful.
    Hug,
    Alyssa

  • Alexis says:

    Hi Olivia, I’m new to finding your page but seeing how radiant, healthy, and happy you look proved to me that you don’t only talk the talk, but walk the walk. You’ve inspired me to do a raw food diet to get back on track and try some of your tinctures. (Nothing like a pandemic to motivate one to be their best!) Anyway, just wanted to let you know that you are BRILLIANT and your passion, curiousity, and willingness to share knowledge with the world is so very admirable. You are a bright light in this chaotic and dystopian world. All the power to you!

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